Well-the day is about over and I am shot. I ate way too much today, I just feel miserable.
I have so much to be thankful for--wonderful husband, beautiful son, a great family, house, cars, money in my bank account, friends, food in my cupboards/fridge, and SO much more. It makes me wonder why we still strive for more more more.Why do we always need better or bigger? I guess it's just human nature to want to better ourselves whether it's really needed or not.
I can't help but feel a little sad right now. I should be holding a newborn baby in my arms, or at least be ready to have one any day. If only our little embies would have made it in February. These days are hard to tackle. I try not to think about it, but it's hard. I am sure I will do the same at the end of June. I still struggle some days, and it's always worse at night. Like tonight especially--Quay is at work and Ryder stayed at grandma and grandpa's house. I have too much time to think about what might have been. I know you can't live life wondering about the 'what-if's'. I still hold out hope that God will grant us the right to give Ryder a sibling.